How to Help Your Daughter Live a Purpose, NOT Pleasure-Driven Life

You’re probably familiar with Burger King’s slogan, “Have it Your Way.”

I believe it sums up today’s culture perfectly.

It’s all about chasing after what you want.

Doing what makes you “feel good.”

And teens are certainly not immune.

That sense of pleasure so many of our teens crave?

We both know it’s NOT sustainable.

And what happens when the “thrill is gone?”

They’re left unfulfilled and yearning for something or someone greater to provide meaning to their life.

In honor of Good Friday and Holy Week, today’s post is about helping your daughter find that greater meaning to her life, outside of pleasure.


“From the time we were born, we were taught to chase the momentary satisfaction. We were taught to find the largest high to fulfill our greatest lows and for me, that was sex. I gained my ultimate satisfaction from the opinion of man. It wasn’t until I discovered that a righteous, pure, just man died for me, that I found my true value and worth, Jesus Christ. Now I no longer have to chase the momentary satisfaction because I’ve found a permanent one. Thank you for planting a seed in all of our lives Ms. Jackie. What you do matters.”

Like the young lady above, many girls turn to sex thinking it will make them “feel good.”

About their lives and themselves.

Only to discover that sex doesn’t add value to their life.

And it doesn’t add meaning.

Which is why it’s so important to help your daughter fill that void with a permanent sense of fulfillment.

Like Faith.

And NOT a temporary “good feeling.”

“Feel Good” Decision-Making is BAD for Your Teen

One of the things I tell students is that society would have them believe that the “Feel Good” approach to decision-making is the way to go.

As I said earlier, the problem with that thinking is that pleasure is fleeting.

It just. doesn’t. last.

Teens have sex.

It feels good.

BUT it doesn’t last.

So, in order for them to feel good again, they have to have sex again.

Teens do drugs. They get high.

It feels good.

BUT it doesn’t last.

Now they have to get high again.

It’s like being trapped on a nightmare Roller Coaster.

They can’t seem to get off.

And if the highlight of their life is that they “feel good,” they’ll spend the rest of their life chasing pleasure.

One day they’ll wake up as an adult and say, “There has to be more to life than this.”

Help Your Daughter Chase Purpose NOT Pleasure

My presentations are designed to help students find purpose in their life from things that are much more fulfilling than pleasure.

And as a parent, you can do the same for your daughter.

Help her chase purpose over pleasure.

If that’s faith for her, great!

Your daughter would certainly be in good company, as I shared here about the impact faith has on teens’ decision-making regarding sex.

Or maybe what gives her purpose is pursuing a hobby or sport that she’s naturally gifted in.

The point is for your daughter to believe that her life has meaning.

And NO temporary pleasure can ever change that.

At the end of the day, the thing that any teen will be most proud of as an adult is not how much sex they had when they were teens.

Nor how many drugs they did.

It will be that their life mattered.

“I would like to thank you for presenting this information in a way that speaks to kids and is easy to comprehend. I would also like to tell you that you inspired me to find a way to make something out of my life, something that matters.”

That when they leave this earth, they left it in a better place than it was when they arrived.

And I believe that sums up the promise of Easter perfectly.

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  • Kelly Canady

    That’s a strong message that EVERY young lady and her parents need to read.    Thanks for sharing, and keep throwing those starfish back into the ocean!  God’s blessings on your purpose!

    • Jackie Brewton

      Thank you, my fellow starfish thrower. So glad we're both on the same team. #TeamSaveOurYouth

  • Leslie

    I struggle with my own purpose. How do I help my daughter with this when I can't find it myself?

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