I pray you and your daughter have been blessed by this 3-part #Back2School series thus far.
To help you get to know who she is inside and out and for her to get to know you too.
Clearly the series has hit close to home with moms like you longing to build a stronger connection with their teen daughters.
Including this mom who sent me the following message after the first week:
Thank you soooooo much Jackie? I’d been asking her the same questions every day “how was your day” she started giving me the same answers “good” 🙄 and I’d say “what made it good?” and she’d get irritated. This explains it. I used your approach and we talked almost all night! Thanks again!
Yes! This is exactly why I created the series.
And her enthusiasm makes me even more excited to jump into this last post where the questions are all about you and your daughter.
But before we get to those, let’s begin with these…
How does your daughter really feel about her relationship with you?
Does she want to spend time with you?
Do you know for sure or are you just assuming?
Have you ever asked her how she feels?
Time and time again, parents can believe one thing about their relationship with their teen and the teen believes the total opposite.
You know why?
Because so many assumptions are being made and so few conversations are being had.
Healthy mother-daughter relationships don’t happen by chance.
The only way you’ll know for sure how your daughter feels about the health of your relationship is to ask.
Ask Your Way to A Better Relationship with Your Daughter
I believe one of the best ways to increase the likelihood that teen girls will make good decisions is for them to have an open and positive relationship with their parents.
A relationship where they feel they have a safe place to land if they’re ever in need.
So, here are questions you can ask your daughter that will help you know for sure how she feels about your relationship, as well as discover her thoughts on how to make it better:
- On a scale of 1-10, how healthy do you think our relationship is? What could I/we do to move that number higher?
- If/When you have a daughter, is there anything that I’m doing that you will do differently? If so, what is it?
- Is there anything you would repeat as a mom that I’m doing? If so, what?
- What is your favorite memory of our time together?
- If I were to die tomorrow, what would you miss most about me?
- If we could take a trip anywhere together, just the two of us, where would you want to go and what would you like to do?
- What does support from me look like? OR Is there anything you need from me that you’re not getting? If so, what is it?
- If we found out that I only had three months to live, how would you want us to spend our time together during those three months?
- Do you feel loved by me? If so, what makes you feel loved? If not, what would it take for you to feel loved?
- Is there anything you’d like to talk with me about, but you don’t feel comfortable? What could I do to make you feel more comfortable talking with me about anything?
- Do you think we spend enough time together? If not, what are some things you would like for us to do together?
Again, you don’t have to ask all the questions above and definitely not all in the same conversation.
The point isn’t for your daughter to feel like she’s being interrogated. Just heard and valued.
And taking the time to ask her the questions I’ve shared over the past three weeks, is a great way to make that happen.
So, go ahead and ask your way to building a better relationship with your daughter.
I’d love to hear how it’s going and what you learn about yourself and each other along the way.
P.S. Now is the time to be intentional about really getting to know who your daughter is inside and out, for her to get to know you, and for you both to build a stronger relationship with one another before she’s all grown up. Use the questions shared in this #Back2School series as your guide, then watch your daughter open-up to you in ways she never has before.
P.P.S. This series seems to have resonated with so many moms looking for ways to connect with their teen daughters. If you know of a mom and daughter duo who could benefit from the info shared in these posts, please spread the word by sharing them on social media! 😊